“Watch what you tell yourself, you’re likely to believe it” Russ Kyle
The Way We Talk to Ourselves is Fundamental to Our Success
As a leadership development practitioner and coach, I have led and coached people who have encountered many different challenging situations, both in the workplace and in their personal lives. I have come to the realisation, that nothing affects us more than our self-talk.
What is Self-Talk?
What is self-talk and how can we improve it? Simply put, self-talk is the running dialogue in our heads. It is the things that we tell ourselves when we are completing a task, reading a book, or simply thinking about life. How impactful is our self-talk on our general mental wellbeing? Expert opinion is unanimous in its conclusion that self-talk is exceptionally impactful and directly affects our success. Positive self-talk is also linked to our level of positivity. We have all been around those ultimate optimists, the life of the party, the happy go lucky. Their positivity is infectious and it is difficult to feel gloomy in their presence. They likely have mastered the art of positive self-talk.
The Benefits of Self-Talk
- When we are more positive in our approach, using statements like “I’ve got this” or “I can overcome this” as opposed to statements like “I will never succeed”, we open new pathways for the brain, encouraging innovative thinking.
- Positive self-talk directly influences our positivity (optimism)
- Being optimistic and practicing positive self-esteem (also known as self-regard) has been proved to increase our chances of achieving our goals and objectives.
- Positive self-talk increases our confidence.
- It helps to reduce stress and anxiety through self-reassurance.
- Positive self-talk and positivity can improve our interpersonal relationships.
So then, it is a no-brainer that changing the way we talk to ourselves, has a knock-on effect which ultimately improves our resilience. Talking to ourselves in a positive way is a means of being kind to ourselves. Would we talk to a dear friend in a negative way? No, of course not, so why do we not treat ourselves better?
How to Improve Your Self-Talk
Like setting out a household budget and being clear about what you are currently spending, assessing your current level of self-talk is a good starting point. Record your self-talk for a week. When you catch yourself mumbling to yourself, what are you saying? Are you reprimanding a child or encouraging the artist in you?
Once you have established what you are saying to yourself, review the words and consider how you can improve your vocab. When is your self-talk more negative? If its during stressful times, think about what you can say to re-assure yourself instead. Also, look for ways that you can affirm yourself. Are you congratulating yourself when you achieve a goal or overcome an obstacle?
In Conclusion
I dare you to be kinder to yourself by improving your self-talk and monitoring how this may influence other areas of your life – It is a great starting point to becoming a stronger you.
If you are struggling with your inner self-talk, coaching can help. Contact me HERE
